 If Abbott and Costello had computers
Now I think this is funny and I don't care who you are!
Abbott & Costello Today
To fully appreciate this, you have to be old enough to remember
Abbott and Costello but not too old not to REALLY understand computers.
For those of us who sometimes get flustered by our computers, please
read on.... If Bud Abbott and Lou Costello were alive today, their
infamous sketch "Who's On First?" might have sounded something like
this:
>Costello calls Abbott to buy a computer from Abbott's store:
>ABBOTT: Super Duper Computer Store. Can I help you?
>COSTELLO: Thanks. I'm setting up an office in my den and I'm thinking
about buying a computer.
> ABBOTT: Mac?
> COSTELLO: No, the name's Lou.
> ABBOTT: Your computer?
> COSTELLO: I don't own a computer. I want to buy one.
> ABBOTT: Mac?
> COSTELLO: I told you, my name's Lou.
> ABBOTT: What about Windows?
> COSTELLO: Why? Will it get stuffy in here?
> ABBOTT: Do you want a computer with Windows?
> COSTELLO: I don't know. What will I see when I look at the windows?
> ABBOTT: Wallpaper.
> COSTELLO: Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software.
> ABBOTT: Software for Windows?
> COSTELLO: No. On the computer! I need something I can use to write
proposals and track expenses. What do you have?
> ABBOTT: Office.
> COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything?
> ABBOTT: I just d id.
> COSTELLO: You just did what?
> ABBOTT: Recommend something.
> COSTELLO: You recommended something?
> ABBOTT: Yes.
> COSTELLO: For my office?
> ABBOTT: Yes.
> COSTELLO: OK, what did you recommend for my office?
> ABBOTT: Office.
> COSTELLO: Yes, for my office!
> ABBOTT: I recommend Office with Windows.
> COSTELLO: I already have an office with windows! OK, let's just say
I'm sitting at my computer and I want to type a proposal. What do I
need?
> ABBOTT: Word.
>COSTELLO: What word?
>ABBOTT: Word in Office.
>COSTELLO: The only word in office is office.
>ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows.
>COSTELLO: Which word in office for windows?
> ABBOTT: The Word you get when you click the blue "W".
>COSTELLO: I'm going to click your blue "w" if you don't start with
some straight answers! What about financial bookkeeping? You have
anything I can track my money with?
> ABBOTT: Money.
> COSTELLO: That's right. What do you have?
> ABBOTT: Money.
> COSTELLO: I need money to track my money?
> ABBOTT: It comes bundled with your computer.
> COSTELLO: What's bundled with my computer?
> ABBOTT: Money.
> COSTELLO: Money comes with my computer?
> ABBOTT: Yes. No extra charge.
> COSTELLO: I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much?
> ABBOTT: One copy.
> COSTELLO: Isn't it illegal to copy money?
> ABBOTT: Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money.
> COSTELLO: They can give you a license to copy money?
> ABBOTT: Why not? THEY OWN IT!
__________________________________________________ _________________________
> A few days later...
> ABBOTT: Super Duper Computer Store. Can I help you?
> COSTELLO: How do I turn my computer off?
> ABBOTT: Click on "START."
__________________ "Thank goodness my wife didn't practice catch & release" |